Your Poems 2013 Week 1

Please share your poems with us here.

We’re looking forward to reading them.

Remember you can leave feedback for other students too. If you do:

Focus on the positives.

Provide specific praise: e.g. “I like your use of line breaks” rather than “It’s the best poem ever”

46 thoughts on “Your Poems 2013 Week 1

  1. I really liked the style of poem that E.E Cummings uses it is very different and i have never seen anything like it or read anything like it. this is my example of a poem like E.E Cummings:
    Lets(Le)Ca
    Tch(Tsgo)A
    Bi(Ona)Gbr
    Own(Adven)Bea
    R(Ture).
    Hope you enjoy Micheal,Charlie Malone, Grafton primary school

    1. Hi Charlie,

      Thank you for sharing your poem with us.

      I’m glad you liked Cumming’s poem. It is unusual but he liked to create new forms of poetry and was experimental.

      I enjoyed reading your poem. It’s a bit of a puzzle too. It took me a while to understand the words. It reads like two different voices to me.

    2. I really liked your poem because you have taken it from another story and put it into a poem! I only found one mistake with your grammar where is should have been AN and you put A! I think it’s really hard to solve, but once i kept looking at it over and over again I understood and i think it is amazing! I will be putting up my own poem in the style of E.E Cummings soon, please leave some feedback and maybe some constructive critisism too!

      By Ella Mai at Hanover Primary School

  2. hello, i really liked the poem i liked how EE Cummings has used his brain and layed it out like that it is really interesting i have never seen a poem like that in my life.Here is one of my poems and i use EE Cummings lay out.
    (a) wa
    it (bo)
    (x) ing
    fo (on)
    (a) r
    so (sh)
    (elf) me
    one

    1. I realy Liked how you layed your poem out just like EE Cummings ,it was just like a puzzle ,and how you had to work it out.It was also intresting to read and fun at the same time.

    2. Hi Baris,

      I liked your poem. I like the way you have to read about the box first and then find out it’s waiting but this creates a delay for the reader too so they’re also waiting. I look forward to reading more of your poems soon.

    3. Hi Baris I like your poem as i think it is quite intreging and makes you wonder about what is in the box or why it is waiting.
      P.S which order should i read it in? brackets first or second?

    4. I really liked the structure of your poem and the way you put it together was clever and really interesting to figure out. You used enjambment well and it seems like you enjoyed doing it!
      Maya (Yerbury)

  3. In class we looked at one of E.E Cummings poems I really like how he did it. At first I was cofused about him using brackets, but then as we read through the poem I started to understand it.
    As I like this so much I wrote my own.
    Here it is:
    (ha)i k
    now(nd)
    yo u
    (it) ha
    ve go
    t it (over)

    1. Hi Javi,

      Thank you for sharing your poem with us. I enjoyed it. I found myself reading the brackets first. Is that how you intended the poem to be read?

      1. hello michael walsh
        you can read it the brackets first or last.
        p.s. did you know that e.e. cummings never wrote in lowercase that is why i am writing in lowercase

  4. Hi Javi i really enjoyed your poem and so i hope that you enjoy reading mine
    Ta(i
    n)l
    ki
    (my)n
    g m
    o (hou)
    u
    (se!)se

    1. Hi Robert,
      Your poem was great because it made it sound very poetic by rhyming it! The way that you wrote that reminded me of Michael Rosen because it was enthusiastic and funny but had a great rhythm and sounded a lot like Cummings.
      Maya (Yerbury)

  5. In class this week we have been looking at the style of E.E cummings poem. At first it was confusing however as I looked at it, it became more clear.I liked the poem so much I wrote my own.

    Here it is:

    (Th)y
    (ink)ou

    (be)s
    p(f)ea

    (ore)k

    1. Hi Emre,

      I’m glad you stuck with the poem and it became more clear. Poetry often asks us to read it more than once to get a better understanding.

      I like your poem. It’s interesting what new words you make when you split words over lines for example I can see “peak” in your last two lines.

  6. Ronaldo has scored
    messi is crying

    R
    ON
    AL
    DO
    HA
    S
    M
    ES
    SI

    IS SC
    CR OR
    YI ED
    NG

    From Tommy Duncombe Priamy School

    1. Hi Tommy,

      It’s good to write about something you are interested in. I like the first part of your poem. It’s interesting all the small words within Ronaldo’s name “on”, “do”, “ha”… the ha works really well as it’s like Ronaldo is laughing at Messi.

  7. THIS IS THE POEM I HAVE WRITTEN

    THE F17 FIGHTER JET WAS SHOT DOWN BY A A ENEMY AIRCRAFT

    TH
    EF
    GH
    TE
    RJ
    ET
    WA
    SS
    HO
    TD
    OW
    NB
    YA
    EN
    EM
    YA
    IR
    CR
    AF
    T.

    1. HI Joshua,

      Thank you for sharing your poem with us.

      The shape of the poem reflects the falling down of the enemy craft but I wonder if you could have varied line length more to achieve a more dramatic effect?

      1. Here is my peom in style of Claude Mckay

        SANNY DAY

        Sunny high on finbruy park,sate parks and girl in the park the chickin and chips has been forgoten.
        A box of chickin on the floor.
        A passing crowd of football players
        jokeing
        jokeing
        thouhing footballs
        makeing turble.
        The blue cloudy
        sky with sping
        leans speeding
        around bird’s
        tweeting and
        singing in the
        huge building
        covering the trees.
        Dreams coming true ,
        water guns shooting.

  8. I think the poem was very unusal never in my life seen a poem before! I’m very glad that Michael chose the poem, it shows that there can be all sorts of poems!!
    I wonder what next weeks poem is going to be????

    Gilespie School:)

  9. The Well Known Zoo.
    Beautiful birds and peacocks and wild lions roaring at people and small insects,and tigers and penguins and helpful keepers,Fit for the wild and dangorous zoo

  10. Here is my poem in the style of Claude McKay…

    the bit i liked about doing the poems is writing it because it was fun and i enjoyed it and i like my poem

  11. Here is my poem in the style of Claude Mckay…

    My favourite part was when we had to make our own poems but in Claude Mckays style

  12. Here is my poem a style of Claude Mkcay…

    Unforgetiable memories!

    Watching TV and enjoying
    The show laughing
    Unstoppiably watching
    My wife and kids
    Happily munching
    Pop corn and drinking
    Fanta which is fit for the
    Night.

  13. my poem is called A sense of School
    School Building and the great maths ,and teachers who will teach you good and awesome people who are dedicated to learn , And dinners what will make you mouthwatering , and make your taste Bugs go crazy and fit for a lovely diet.

    T

  14. Here’s a style of Langston Hughes…

    Uncle’s house!

    Hot bright house in
    Uncle’s house children in the
    Room and children in the kitchen
    A school-bus some man has
    Forgotten a hoover on a
    Radio on number is
    765
    Was the number a young
    Chilling in the living room.

  15. The fresh breeze outside , and the playground with lots of fun to Cheer you up everytime and your friends will love it , clubs what are fun , and the sports are great.

  16. Here is my poem in the style of Claude McKay…

    Christmas Day and you are enjoying having a dinner on christmas day,
    And you can open the amazing presnts,
    and you can eat chicken, turkey before you go to sleepy. And in the morning
    you and your family say merry christmas day in the morning .
    After in a few weeks it start to snow and your familiy goes out and enjouy it
    merry christmas everyone bye.

  17. Poem in the style of Claude McKay:
    happy eid
    Getting money and getting ready
    wearing my most fancy cloth
    people where ready for eid
    and I was ready to go.

    Going to the cinema
    at wood green
    I went passed a shop
    called mr and misses bean.

    We went to subway
    and they showed me the way
    after I ate
    we went away.

    We booked a ticket
    at 17.00 and
    I went into the arcade
    and I hit the jackpot.

    Watching a movie
    bringing back memories
    of me being a child
    playing with my cat dewy
    which made me weep.

    I ate so much popcorn
    it was fit for a king.

  18. The forgotten post : Aged 11
    In the style of : Cluade Mackay …. … .. .

    Sunset blinding,
    on the deserted streets,
    serene music in the pubs,
    loud music in the bowling alley,
    some post forgotten,
    at the doorstep,
    in the middle of a bare street,
    music starting up,
    from ab gramophone,
    ” silence ” was the record !!!

    A dog,
    yapping by its owners heels,
    a passing a cat,
    head held high,
    purrs,
    sudenly,
    like a steady heartbeat,
    purrs,
    niether loud nor quiet,
    purrs,
    the sun is rising higher in the sky,
    purrs,
    stopping the music in the pubs,
    stopping the music in the bowling alley,
    leaving untouched the post on the doorstep !!!

    Note : i hope you have thorouly enjoyed reading my poem that i have graphted so hard on …. … .. .

  19. here is a peom in the style of claude mckay

    where’s home now?

    cold numb fingers for the winter air and white puffy clouds floating in the sky.
    White snow-capped trees hanging down and,
    Hot tomato soup warming in the pan,ready to eat fit for the finest life,
    starring at the phone,bring back old memories,
    of my far away home and blossominmg flowers in the garden and,
    Ripe delicious tomato’s ready to eat with anything,
    Warm summer breeze passses as every body sits down for christmas dinner.

  20. Here my poem in sytle of Claude Mckay

    The part that I like best was that it didn’t rhyme , because most poem rhymes.
    This next Poem is called “Memories”

    Swing sets and massive climbing frames ,and a titchy slide,
    Steep ponds and lots of children,
    And skateboard park and bike areas and seesaws,
    Fit for children to be active as possible.

    Sat outside the gate, bringing vintage memories to my head,
    Of when I was a very young child enjoying myself in the park.
    And every morning I got to go to our local cinema.
    But I’m way too old to go there and I’m very poor.

    My eyes grew heavy, and my brain lost my old memories;
    A heart attack struck through me like a lightning bolt,
    I had a last chance to make it happen ,
    My body began to shake so I knew it was time.

  21. My poem is called Home Sweet Home

    Horrible rules and adults and boring books
    Arch enemies and best friends,
    Water fountains and homework and lunch,
    Fit for normal kids at school.

    Sat in the window, bringing memories
    Of annoying siblings playing by the toy box
    And cosy furniture, and buffet breakfasts
    In my comfortable breakfast area.

    My eyes grew dim, and I could no more gaze;
    A wave of longing through my body swept,
    And hungry for the old familiar ways
    So now I turn aside and listen to what the teacher said.

  22. hey I’m going to write a poem….
    In the stly of claude macay….

    mountain tops and beatiful blue skies,lisening to the sky scrapers.
    And the waves that suck you in,
    It’s fit for a king.

    staring at a picture, bringing memores of going to gramma and grampa’s house, laden by the sweet summer birds tweeting.

    my eyes grow dim, i could not gase anymore,
    A wind wind of longing began to comence,
    AS an icey wind took that away,
    so I turned and wept.

    I think thats aworsome

  23. here is my poem a style of Claude Mkcay…

    Love you god

    Beautiful lands sweet
    juicey fruit and a loving god.
    yummy food fit for a god
    and smooth floors
    and awesome powers.

    Smelling fresh air, nice flowers
    and clean unbreakable houses.
    Gold doors and majestic fair
    and truthful people. fancy
    cloths for free, high tech spy toy
    for every child.

    why am i not there.
    i am going soon amen.
    killing people,and bad people
    swearing
    and going against gods law
    and uncontrollable people.
    unclean air
    bad illnesses
    and children being led astray
    what life is this
    sins must stop
    let there be light.

    My mouth grows tired
    and i could no more chat.

    A wave of anger
    awoken through my body
    and hunger for the old lovely ways.

  24. I’ve stayed in a tower all my life.
    I want to go home
    Where it’t cosy and warm and comfy
    A girl gets sick of a boy.

    I want to go home right now
    And maybe a little peak
    To where the big big mall is
    I want to go today.

    They do some fun thing’s
    They have some proper fun
    My mum say’s no but I say it’s done
    How they don’t have to work for everyone.

    My mum tell’s me what will you be when you grow up
    Will you grow up to be a pilot
    That which I’ll be taken to go home sooner or late
    On account banning most stuff which I wish.

    But I say it’s fine honest I do
    And I’d like to be a pilot to
    And wear pilot clothes that stink’s of poo
    And strut the street’s with a flood from the loo.

    By Ibtisam Pakeman primary school year 6

  25. Big coconuts and small,are on a huge tree and it’s brown,and delicious,it islike a circle,
    However it is blue and beautiful,I am shattered and shaken,because I am not there with you!

  26. I’ve been caged for all my life,
    And I want to be free.
    Where it’s fun,enjoyable and exhilarating.
    A man gets sick of his wife.

  27. Wonderful poetry from everyone! Such fantastic imagery…. I love that so many of you have brought your own lives into the heart of your work. 🙂

Leave a Reply

Your email address will not be published. Required fields are marked *